Ode to Mark and the Dirty Spoon

By Aileen Hansen

Getting off to work comes way too soon.
I find in the drawer, a stained dirty spoon.
I call in my wife and display the ware.
She simply responds, “You know I don’t care!”
From deep in my gut wells a roar quite great.
Which intensifies the disdain of my mate.
“My loved one,” she says, “why don’t you know
How important it is to just let it go?”


My morning starts off like a silly and sorry country-western song. The problem is that it’s not a song. And it’s not really silly. It’s just plain sorry.

It is hard for me to accept that my harried husband is trapped in a time warp, enraged by a benign, tiny spoon. I can feel the rapid beating of my heart and the spontaneous tensing of my shoulders. Deliberately responding to the sensations, I start to deep-breathe. I purposely relax my tense, upright posture, while being reminded of my recent Amrit Yoga training session.

Yogi Amrit Desai teaches that as life unfolds, there is “no need to change anything.” This means that there is essentially no need to resist the present moment, because it is reality happening. In other words, it is futile to resist reality.

I want to tell my husband that the moment is acceptable just as it is. We both need to hear this. Editing or rewriting the present is not necessary--or even possible! Life unfolds in its own way. The overall momentum of life is like a tidal wave that the little self cannot control. We need to be reminded of this over and over again.

It is best to respond, rather than react, to life. This frees us to consciously take action, maybe (or maybe not) resulting in a change of affairs. Desai explains that “in the state of being, you are present and at peace with what is. Just the right actions, the right solutions and the right thing to say will emerge naturally.”

I continue to breathe, relax and let go. I take action. Mischievously kissing my husband’s cheek, I press a clean spoon into his hand. The hardened glare on his face softens. I feel prompted to share my tidbit of wisdom with him. Reluctantly but attentively he listens.

As I drop the dirty spoon in the dishwasher, I realize how important it is to flow with my life and my husband just as they are. My breathing is slow and easy now. I’m listening to George Jones, wailing a country-western ballad on a local Houston radio station. He begins the song in a timeless voice, “I’ll love you till I die.” I glance at my husband, who is now peacefully engaged with his cereal, and I smile.

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A yoga teacher for 21 years, Aileen Hansen has been studying with Kripalu Yoga founder, Yogi Amrit Desai, since 1988. She is currently working on certification in his Level II Amrit Yoga program.